New Mom and New Wife figuring it out one day at a time…

Tweet your 16 year old self

So the last few days I have been seeing these tweets to our 16 year old selves, you know like trying to warn ourselves of something or boost our confidence and while some of these tweets are cute and funny some really made me think if I would change anything if I could talk to my 16 year old self today.  16 year olds are know it all, wanna be 18 year olds. At least I was. I had made a bargain with my parents when I was 15 going on 16 to go on an abroad trip with Chester County Voices Abroad to Holland and Belgium.  The deal was putting off getting my drivers license the summer I turned 16 in order to go on the trip. This worked out well and I am SO GLAD I went on that trip, considering I did get my license eventually anyway. The year I was 16 though was definitely a turning point in my life. It was the last year that I never smoked a cigarette, it was the last year I had not yet been exposed to smoking pot, it was the last year that no one I knew was pressuring me to sneak alcohol, even though I didn’ t LIKE alcohol, ( I still don’t though I learned to mask the taste) The boyfriend I had when I was 16, I could have done better but my “first time” was when I was 16 and while that was probably too early, it was perfect and under the stars in late summer. I don’t regret that, I never have. What would I tell my 16 year old self? I don’t know, I don’t know if my 16 year old self would believe what happens to me me  a couple years later. 17-18 is when shit hit the fan. Lots of that is too personal and detailed to go into but 16 was the last time I was innocent about everything in life. When I turned 17 that’s when peers started to expose the dirtier parts of life, drugs, more sex, rebellion, college applications. I turned 18 the summer before my senior year of high school and that is a whole other story but my 16 was boring and naive and all I wanted was to be 18. I have told myself a million times that I would never be 16 again if I had the chance, and I still feel that way. I had no power, no influence but I was having way more fun than I realized at the time. If I could say anything to my sixteen year old self I would say things like how cardio workouts on a daily basis are an important and hard thing to do and starting early will help when I have a baby 11 years later. My 16 year old self will probably ignore that advice. I would tell myself also to listen to my head and not my heart so much. There are so many more things that I would “warn” myself of, but at the same time all things mold us good and bad, so if I hadn’t had some of those bad experiences then maybe I wouldn’t have met my husband. Through some of those bad experiences I rose from the ashes with life long friends and valuable experiences that make me the person I am right now. As frustrating as it is to be me right now, I love who I am and I wouldn’t change that for anything. Maybe I would just tell my 16 year old self to save more money because the economy is going to tank. Other than that I would #tweetyour16yearoldself to spend more time with your grandmother because you’re going to get too busy to spend time with her right before shes diagnosed with cancer and 6mos to live. That may be one of my only regrets in life. That I didn’t spend more time with my grandma Elaine ( my mothers mom) She was my favorite and she would have LOVED Jules soooo much. I wish I had been there for her more in her final months.  I wanted to name my daughter Alania after my grandmother but Sam and I agreed on Juliette Claire. If I have another girl though, she will definately be named after my Grandma Elaine, the most amazing woman I ever knew.  That is what I would #tweetmy16yearoldself,  you know, if my 16 year old self knew what twitter was.

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